|
This section/portion
contributed by Roxann Palmisano from Marrero, Louisiana!
July 13, 2005
|
HOW
FAR CAN YOU SEE
Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking
..... and one blonde says to the other:
"Which do you think is farther away .... Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says,
"Hellooooooooooo, can you see Florida...........????"
|
CAR
TROUBLE
A blonde pushes her BMW into
a gas station.
She tells the mechanic it died.
After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She
says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor."
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
|
SPEEDING
TICKET
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely
if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together.
Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to
show it to you!"
|
RIVER
WALK
There's this blonde out for a walk.
She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
"Yoo-hoo!" She shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts
back, "You ARE on the other side."
|
KNITTING
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the
freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see
what the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren,
the trooper cranked down his windo, turned on his bullhorn
and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"
|
BLONDE
ON THE SUN
A Russian, an American and a Blonde were talking one day. The
Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.
"You can't land on teh sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the
Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're
going at night!"
|
IN A
VACUUM
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn.
She rolled the dice and landed on Science & Nature.
Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name,
can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
|
BLONDE
JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs
and asked what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was
named Timex.
Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
"HellOOOooo, " answered the blonde. "They're watch dogs!"
|
|
The below is contributed by Marty
C. Raybon, Sr. from Jackson, Michigan,
who says a blonde joke is not just
about females and told me this one about BLONDE MEN ... August
2005 ....
|
There
were these two blonde men .... one was digging a hole and would move
about 3 feet and dig another hole,
while the first man was digging the second hole, another man came along
behind him & filled up the first hole!
The first man finished the second hole and moved about 3 feet and began
digging another hole,
again the other man came along and began filling up the second hole.
The first man finished the third hold and moved up about 3 feet and
began digging a fourth hole.
The second man came along and filled the third hole and was waiting for
the fourth hole to be finished.
The neighbor could not take it any longer ... so he came over ....
he asked the two blonde men, "Why in the world are you digging holes
all over the place and filling them up again?!"
The two blondes looked at each other, not thinking they had done
anything out of the ordinary. The neighbor was told, "Well, the
third man with the trees did not show up for work today."
|
|
